Exciting things in my life:
-I am typing this on a brand new oh-so-fantastic computer!
-I am visiting friends in Lubbuttock this week and that is SO nice!
-I worked out a general scheme for teaching Earth Science this year...just the big topics, not the actual lessons...but a major accomplishment
-Yesterday I was really bummed (just not so hot about life in general kind of moodiness) but Emily Louise so encouraged me that I woke up today thinking that everything is going to be ok
-My little friend Makenna called me Aunt Sarah yesterday and Tracen can sort of say Sarah, that made me smile!
Things not so exciting:
-Why do I struggle so often with knowing that God will make everything ok - will work out everything for his glory and my good - and yet feeling like I have somehow messed everything up, or that I am missing something and all is not as it should be right this second?
-I have realized that, despite being way excited about being employed and getting to teach, I am also completely terrified about it...and I start Aug. 4! That's soon!
-Realizing too that God has placed me in el hometown at the moment (I realized on the drive up to Lubbock that not one single school district that I applied for in Texas has responded to me), and that that is good in so many ways, but that I am going to be forced to get outside myself and continue to learn to be a friend - and ridiculous as it sounds, that is so difficult for me...and I am so often fighting thoughts of wanting to be back in Lubbock where I have friends, or wanting to be one of those married folk that seem to surround me these days, or even just not being grateful for how my parents have let me live at home, wishing I could have my own space - all basically a total disregard for where God has placed me right now...ugh, makes me want to throw things at myself! How is it that God has brought me through such a rough year to peace and joy and trusting him (more than I did at least) and yet, I whine? When does head knowledge really transfer to heart knowledge?
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